Please read our guidelines before launching OutLife's forums

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OutLife Provides a safe and non-judgemental space for LGBTQ+ people to talk to one another about their issues and life experience. OutLife's forums are designed to compliment existing services and should not replace your relationship with your GP or counsellor. 

If you are thinking about ending your life or acting on thoughts of suicide please call 999 (or 112 if you live outside of the UK) immediately and ask for an ambulance. There will be no judgement, only people who want to help you. 

If you don't need immediate attention head straight to any A&E department at your local hospital and tell them that you feel like you are close to harming yourself and need some assistance. Again, they will not judge you. You will get the support you are looking for. 


We want everyone to feel safe and supported in our online community, so please read the guidelines below and refer to them if you're unsure about something. Remember: everyone deserves respect and compassion.

Core rules

  • 16+ only. Forum members must be over the age of sixteen to sign up and make posts.
    No harassment, trolling, or verbal abuse. This one's pretty simple: be respectful. We have zero tolerance for aggressive language (yes, this means swearing at people), threatening violence, or being generally unpleasant to members of the forum.
  • No hate speech. OutLife is for all LGBTQ+ people, and attacks based on gender, race, age or sexuality will result in instant bans. If you have a problem with trans people / black people / bisexual people, take your problem somewhere else. Attacks don't have to be directed at a member; making blanket statements about these groups - "all bi people are...." is also a nono. 
  • No spam or advertising. Whatever you're selling, we're not interested. These kinds of posts will be taken down straight away. Pointing towards external products or services isn't totally forbidden, but should be appropriate to the conversation being had. 
  • No inappropriate links. Any linking to vulgar, pornographic, hateful, or otherwise unsuitable content outside of OutLife is not allowed. 
  • Respect people's opinions. You may disagree with other forum members on a huge variety of topics, but that's no excuse for bad behaviour. State your case, but be mindful of others and that your opinions may differ. If you think someone else is wrong, then your only options are to speak politely, leave it be, or if there's possible danger, inform an admin.
  • Protect anonymity. Lots of people wish to remain anonymous online with good reason. Never pressure anyone to reveal their identity, or anything that may reveal their identity (name, specific location etc). 
  • Only one account per person. Any duplicates will be found and removed.
  • Don't swap personal details. We've disabled user-to-user messaging so we can maintain these boards as a safe space more easily. Any contact details like email addresses or mobile numbers will be immediately removed by a moderator. We're currently looking into safe ways to allow our members to connect safely outside of the boards.

Members who keep on breaking the rules will be banned permanently

Posting advice

  • Keep it on topic. Try to keep threads on the original topic in the first post. Conversations may drift slightly over time, as is natural, but if they drift too far we may close a thread. We've deliberately created spaces for members to chat about life, the universe, and everything, which exist outside of the Advice and Support area. Please use them!
  • Be compassionate and understanding. Members will come here with all kinds of problems, thoughts, and needs. Responses should take that into account and not be judgmental. We're all at different stages in our journey, so try to put yourself in the other person's shoes before posting a reply.
  • Shouting louder isn't being heard. Your post probably isn't going to help someone if it's ALL CAPS AND EXCLAMATION MARKS!!! Instead, try engaging with the other people in the thread and making your reply as clear / thoughtful / helpful as possible.
  • If in doubt, ask an admin. You might have a response in mind, but are unsure whether it's appropriate. You might be worried about someone. You could just be unsure what to say. Whatever your concern, the best thing to do is message an admin so they can point you in the right direction.

Talking about mental health

We should all be mindful of how to speak about LGBTQ+ mental health. Here are a few do's and don'ts to be aware of.

  • Using the right language. Don't refer to people as crazy, mental, psycho etc etc - this kind of language is stigmatising and.. well... just plain wrong. 
  • Don't try and diagnose. If someone is sharing their particular symptoms, or experience of mental health problems, it's best not to play doctor. Outright stating that someone is bi-polar, manic depressive, or obsessive compulsive isn't helpful: they need to get a proper diagnosis from a medical professional. However, do feel free to share your own experiences, and if you have an inkling someone might be depressed, suggest they get themselves checked out.
  • Stories of suicide. When talking about someone's suicide, try to avoid the specifics of someone's death (how they did it), or pinning it on a single reason (his boyfriend left him). Spreading the method can be dangerous and no person takes their life for a single reason - it's far more complicated than that. Avoiding these cab protect people who may be experiencing suicidal feelings and are vulnerable. 

We've got an amazing community and we hope you find what you're looking for in the OutLife forums. If you have any questions or concerns, you can ping us a message here or email us at [email protected]

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